And your headlines for this morning?

Checking out to see if riding the moto were an option today (no), and these were the headline stories. Not much going on around here I guess.

This is both funny and sad:
Six students at Stoneman Elementary School in Pittsburg have been  suspended after a fifth-grade girl allegedly brought a pot-laced dessert to  school Monday and shared it with her friends. During an afternoon recess at the school, located at 2929  Loveridge Road, two students told a yard supervisor that several kids were  eating a small chunk of a baked treat made with Fruity Pebbles that contained  marijuana, officials said.

And this falls into the category, so what:
Officials at the University of California, Santa Cruz say they found the image of a noose scribbled on the inside of a bathroom door. The graffiti was discovered Monday in the school's Earth and Marine Sciences building. School spokesman Jim Burns says the words "San Diego" and "lynch" were written on either side of it.

All the dick and fart jokes that were written around the noose didn't make the news?